The post-vacation calm was fleeting, I was actually in a good mood for the few days after I returned from Oaxaca before I got sick. Now, NYC knocked me back into my usual chronic low-grade foulness. Or maybe I'm just blaming the city and it's all me. I'm sure it's me.
Tuesday alone started inducing chest pains. Literally, and CVS pharmacy only added to the problem. Do you really want to tell someone with high blood pressure that they have no record of your high blood pressure prescription you pick up every single month like clockwork and that you need to go to the other counter after they've already waited in line for 10 minutes already making them late for work. My heart will explode with anger one day. When asked what I was there to pick up, I couldn't remember the brand name and said correctly, "blood pressure medication, generic Procardia." The pharmacist looked at my record on screen and offered, "Microgestin?" No, not birth control pills, my other monthly prescription to prevent the heart attack I was about to have on site. Once again, "Microgestin?" Are you fucking serious? Does a pharmacist not know that Microgestin is not for hypertension. I was then directed to wait in line at the other end of the counter. Originally, I was feeling sympathetic to the pharmacist because the guy in front of me who was taking so much time was kind of menacing and hard to please until I realized how retarded the pharmacist was (apparently, they guy's prescription couldn't be filled until after 1pm, it was 9:30am, and he wanted that day's dose to hold him over. Eventually, the younger female pharmacist had to come over to see what the problem was and just gave the guy his two pills he wanted). The interaction was odd, the customer was an enormous African-American man in fatigues while the pharmacist is short, slightly built man with glasses who appears to be African-African, possibly Ethiopian. I always wonder if people will be more forgiving of someone of their own race, if subconsciously, but I don't really think so. Poor service pisses off everyone.
Still not having any explanation why my $100 and some change debit card theft claim was denied. If you call the Capital One phone number and extension listed on the form letter you will always get a recording instructing to leave a message and that your call will be returned in 48 hours. No one calls you back. If you go to your branch, they will just call the same number and get the same recording. If you call general customer service they will call this number and get the same recording. The best that could be offered to me was to leave a message in said recording on my behalf and to expect a call within 48 hours. I am waiting.
I paid $75 for a food travel writing workshop at ICE like a month ago. I'm hesitant to pay for classes when I could really just pitch stories on my own but I have motivation problems and sometimes it takes something organized to inspire me to act. I was curious about this class last December this same week but I was in Hong Kong at the time. I showed up for my December 7 class at 7pm only to realize it was December 8. I missed my class, am out the money and the receptionist was basically, we don't care, please leave now. My own fault for sure, but really?
My concentration and memory has been progressively getting worse (evidence above) when I used to be sharp and punctual. No one seems to believe me. My doctor said it sounded like depression. I would not disagree with that but medicine is useless. I took Effexor in Sept and Oct and it only made me extremely hungry, tired, spacey, angry, like violently so and hopeless. Really not helpful. I remembered why my experimenting with 5+ antidepressants in 1999 was a bust.
Ok, now I will attempt to get into the Christmas spirit even though I haven't really celebrated the holiday in over a decade. I only enjoy December because it's when I give up on attempting health and eat and drink whatever I feel like. January is going to be painful.
To look forward to: random 3-night Chicago trip over NYE and potential SE Asian excursion in mid-February. Food and travel are the only two things that don't make me angry.