True Barf

I apologize for bringing you another emotionally-induced vomit so soon, but this opening scene from last Sunday’s True Blood was so dramatic I couldn’t let it pass. (By the way, I’m really liking this show as cornball and softcore pornish [according to New York] as it may be. While many years removed from the respectable age for Goth vampire fascination, I do get the appeal. With that said, I have zero interest in Twilight.)

In a nutshell, Sookie (played by Anna Paquin, who I kind of have a soft spot for because I’m fascinated by still-working grown child stars who don’t possess super Hollywood looks) who is dating a vampire and can read minds figures out it was the vampire bartender at Fangtasia who has been stealing money, not the human waitress so Bill, her vampire boyfriend, rams a stake through the bartender’s heart just as he’s attacking Sookie. This results in a lot of a blood being splattered. Vampire blood, no less. Gross, sure, but I still don’t think it would make me barf. The human waitress loses the contents of her stomach, however.

As much as I’m baffled by on screen vomit clichés, I must admit that I have an irrational vomit trigger that was pushed to its limits this afternoon. Mold. If I see, smell or even think that see or smell the disgusting fuzz, my throat clenches, my stomach jumps and I start to gag. It’s ridiculous. I almost had a mishap after discovering a plastic container of romescu sauce that I’d made over a month ago hiding in the back of the refrigerator. The surface was covered in what looked like sky blue Froot Loops. Seriously, I’ve never seen mold form like that. I nearly lost it. I’m so grossed out now that I’m scared to put dishes in the sink lest they get mold residue on them.