I'm not sure if my tastes have changed or if it's an unusually ugly era for fashion right now. I still have a job, I'm even freelancing a little on the side (currently doing research for a reissue of New York Post editor's book—cue jokes about the Post actually fact checking) so I'm not destitute. I'm in the market for a "nice" dress, handbag and pair of shoes and yet came away from a Saturday at Woodbury Commons completely empty handed. My last two visits to Target were also a bust. I used to find so many things I liked there, I had to restrict how often I went. Even at Old Navy, which everyone thinks is ick, I always found one or two cute items that no one believed I bought there. I haven't found shit there in like all of 2009 (technically, I did order two basics: black trousers and bootcut jeans from them online).
These are the silly shoes I want. While scoffing at the cut out toe boots kids are wearing, I am drawn to these because of the reasonable two-inch heel and aqua-colored lining and they're kind of trendy but not totally obnoxious. However, they do not come in 9.5. Do I need to bring up this extremely annoying pet peeve again? A 10 is too loose and a 9 pinches, I need a half size. Yet, every brand at Urban Outfitters and many other stores only sell half sizes up to an 8.5 then go 9, 10 and maybe 11 if you're lucky (size 11 gals might have it worse than 9.5). What the fuck is wrong with them?
Apparently, I am now a 12/L by mainstream standards, but that is useless for designer clothing (which I'm too cheap to buy anyway). For those, 12 is considered XL and most brands stop at a 10 (I’m a bit steamed that this Vena Cava collection for Gap only goes up to a 10—it's the Gap, you know, where fat Americans shop and sizes normally go up to a 20. Oddly, one-half of this design team has their home featured today on Design*Sponge and she found an amazing dining room table on the streets of Carroll Gardens when all I ever see are discarded boxes containing filthy children's books and toys. Exclusive sizing and scoring valuable furniture in my neighborhood? If I ever see this woman, I will strangle her with her own vintage jumpsuit). And those that do make a 12, say Marc Jacobs, are sized considerably smaller than what you might find at Banana Republic, as much as four inches smaller in the waist.
So, I can't wear any of the clothes at Urban Outfitters, fine, they're for girls but 90% of the stuff on Shopbop and Net-a-Porter are useless to me as well. I guess these are for youngsters, too. It's not like I'm in the market for a romper (I do semi-believe in the if you wore it the first time 'round you should bow out when it comes back, though not with the venom of internet commenters), I don't wear anything crazy short and am not in any position to go braless, I just don't think I'm ready for Chico's (Signature Santa Fe Atherton Jacket pictured at top) J. Jill or Talbot's yet.
Where are you supposed to shop if you're over 35, over a size 10 and not a mom or office frump?